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on this windy afternoon.

Thu May 19, 2005, 12:15 PM
And we looked like giants.





I wish I could just lay outside somewhere and not be seen.
I'm having trouble sleeping. I miss sleeping at the park...
I stayed up till 4:30 am today. It was horrible. I kept wanting to just take and axe and chop at my window frame.

This video project is really stressing me out. Having the teacher waste my time with trying to understand my video concept and then trying to get the class in on my idea too, just to change the whole thing around and then change it right back and then she has the nerve to get on my back about how I have to get it done this week pisses me off.

My group is no help either, they had no opinions except Mike and he's psycho. If I put the camera in their hands they'd just ask, "what do I do? what are we doing?" and I don't have time for that.

My eye twitches alot now. I sometimes feel like pounding my head to make it stop. Fudduddgge... there it went again.

I can just picture myself, going on a killing spree. I really have no way to release my frustration so it builds up. These thoughts of attacking people and things with axes shows no sign of a healthy mind.

They say, "hit a pillow!" but I just can't. I used to tear paper but then I'd feel bad for wasting paper or I'd break beer bottles but then I'd feel bad for making a mess.


I need a date to my sister's wedding, I have a feeling I won't be able to get one.

So depressing....


I can't wait until June. I will be seeing NoFX, hopefully with Adam, if not, what's his face will go, if he's not working. Then summer will be here, and I'll go visit what's his face and maybe Ren too because he has a car and is nice too hehe.

Oh, I just made myself feel a little better. Gosh darnit, where's a time machine when you need it?!

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